It's Heavy not Easy

I still remember, back in the good old days of High School, I had a fight with my bestfriend. It was bad and sad. I was having a hard time. We were fighting because of, I think ideology. Well, as my bestfiend I expected her to always be on my side. One day, I was mocked by my classmate, I wanted her to stand for me but she didn't. Instead she made it worse. I was so angry at her.

The problem solved few days later. We couldn't stand hating each other and finally broke the ice. We said sorry and hugged each other, we were crying and everyone else watching. The boys said "oh girls, why were you even fighting in the first place huh?" We laughed, case closed :)

In the middle of third grade, I was having a what-so-I-thought-a-deadly-ploblem with a girl in my class. Well, at that time, the problem seemed too hard to be handled, but if I thought about it now, it was, silly. We were fighting over a boy *I know right? I got the boy and she got the woe.

It was quite serious. The whole classmate knew about it and there was time when our fight got really worse. Like, in times when the teacher put us in the same group, it was so tense. I didn't like it, made everyone uncomfortable. My friend then thought of something. So, near the final examination, all the girls were sitting together in the class, like in a meeting. No boys are involved, we kicked them out from the class. In the meeting, we came to the fact that anyone actually had problem with others, it wasn't only about me and that girl. There was tears and confession, but after all, everything was clear. No one had any grudge anymore. I believe that was great, I meant, it was great that we can be honest, apologized, and forgiving before we went separated after the graduation.

Now, in college, another problem occurred. Yes, I knew that problem would always follow you, no matter where you are. This time, it was just hard. Maybe because I wrote this when I am facing it. Maybe I would consider it silly someday. What I knew was that, this problem couldn't be solved by sorry or hugs or gathering people together. This is way more complicated. These people are what's-so-called-haters this day. they just hate you no matter what you did. I haven't got any idea how to solve it. I don't know what to do.

Well, as it's said, Life goes on and gets so heavy not easy. So I guess this is what it takes of being alive. If it hurts, it means that we are human, not zombie. I believe, this problem will mature me and shape me into a better girl, probably a woman ;)